When my son was four he wanted to try to do everything by himself. Need help pouring milk?
He'd say, "I can do it!"
Need help with the puzzle?
He'd say, "I can do it!"
Need help opening the car door?
He'd say, "I can do it!"
He wanted to do everything himself, but when he found out that he wasn't strong enough, he'd get frustrated. It was his personal challenge to be big and strong and he wanted the sense of achievement. He was proud when he finished a task on his own and he was angry when he couldn't do something on his own.
Can you do everything yourself? I cannot. We are, I'm afraid, often like my son was then. We want to do it ourselves, we want to achieve, and we don't want to ask for help. We like the sense that we're strong and we don't need the help of others.
Asking for help, I've learned, isn't a sign of weakness. Asking for help is good – it allows us to rely on talent, resources, and knowledge that we may not have ourselves. While we should try to learn, be self-reliant, and experience all that we can there are just some things in life that we can't do on our own.
When you need help, just ask for it. Identify who can help you, swallow some pride, and just come right out and ask. Don't hint. Don't explain the story and look at your friend. Just ask.
